Bi-Polar Lives: My Dad & Stephen Fry

Here I present a wonderfully written account of a young woman whose father had Bipolar disease.

Sadie Hasler

Last week, in a podcast with lovely comedian Richard Herring, Stephen Fry felt comfortable enough to speak with further candour about his ‘bi-polar life’. Confessing that he had only last year attempted suicide, he went a little further than he has previously done, giving us another intimate instalment of his condition – a duty he takes seriously as the president of charity Mind. It was shocking to hear of such an act, but perhaps more so of such recency; you always naively hope, despite his frankness about his lows, that he has conquered the demons since his famous breakdown of 1995, which saw him walking out of a West-End play to sail for Belgium, (as good a place for dark thoughts as any).

It is something I remember vaguely from the news while I was staying at my Dad’s bungalow in North Wales. I naturally thought it was sad, but…

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A Brand New Life – Pt 3 – About this Blog

And so as I get ready to write in earnest on this blog, I take a moment to reflect on what you may wish to read about.  I believe that you want truth, to be able to relate my problems to your own problems and maybe to see the parallels and conflicts in your life.

I hope that you will also see a need to write in addition to talk therapies and medications. Often writing will bring a problem to be examined in a rational light. So, without further ado, I invite you to follow my brief posts and comment if you like.  Image

A Brand New Life – Pt 1 – About this blog

A brand new life is a bit of a stretch for a title, but the subtitle is right on target.  This blog is about my fight with bipolar syndrome.  At this time, I am very stable and have been for about a year. No extremes, no depressions or manic episodes. Mostly in the neutral zone.  Oh there have been little blips over the year but they are recognizable and lasted only a day or, at most, two days.

So why a blog if I’m stable?  It took seven years of medication changes and pretty intense therapy to get here.  I say seven years, but that was since I had an extreme depressive episode that saw me hospitalized.  That was not, however my first major depression.  I have had them since I was in college.  My depressions have also often been accompanied by migraine attacks.  I still get the migraine headaches, but not a nearly the same frequency as during the bad times.  I credit the medications I am on for the improvements for both situations. 

So getting down to it, I write this now to try to be an encouraging example to others as to how they may also have hope and determination to get through their dark days.  I truly believe that bipolar syndrome is an illness that one can fight and win.  It’s a combination of situations you have to learn to balance as well as a chemical imbalance your doctor has to try to adjust to fit your needs. That is what it means by syndrome.

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“The liberty of a democracy is not safe if the people tolerate the growth of private power to a point where it comes stronger than their democratic state itself. That, in its essence, is fascism – the ownership of government by an individual, by a group.” FDR

Bipolar Chat City Part 1

There is a new dating site called Bipolar Chat City who would charge me $40 for a 3 month membership to meet and chat with ‘Bipolar’ women.  No guarantee that there will be anyone remotely close to me I would like to actually meet.  May try trial membership but not for another week at least.

I couldn’t wait. Signed up for the free membership and I’m glad that I did it that way. That site is just getting started and there are few people on it with bipolar.  I knew it in my bones that I shouldn’t pay for it.  Have you ever been on a dating site that didn’t deliver for you?

I have been blessed with many things since I have returned from the darkness. For one thing, I have crawled and clawed my way back to something in the way of good health. I have a good relationship with my ex of 20 years and with my daughters. All are good things. I have not sought out a new love – primarily due to the fact that I am wary of starting a new relationship. It is hard enough when you’re not potentially facing a downward spiral or manic highs. No, it’s something I want but won’t let myself have.

My Small, Small World Pt 2

One last note…
If anyone can tell me how to do this successfully please tell me about it.

A Brand New Life

One reason I claim a ‘small, small world’ is that I strive to control my environment. I work very hard to keep my world under control so that I don’t go into another depression or mania.  I limit my exposure, my activities and my social contacts to specifically avoid entering into potential problems.  Some would say that it’s not living.  I would say that living in a bipolar state of mind is not living.  It is a hell on earth and I may not keep it from recurring but I will do my best to prevent it. I may never have another partner, only a few friends, and my family.  But I will make due.

 

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